I’ve always struggled with decisions, but recently, my indecisiveness took on a new challenge when I had to decide between the two loves of my life: my partner and my project.
My partner, Dan, was recently relocated to Melbourne on a 2-year contract and I couldn’t decide whether to join him or stay in the UK to pursue Creating Wellbeing. I was also worried that either decision would take me away from my connection with India.
I sought advice from friends, family, CWB colleagues and even a life coach; all listened openly. Most reassured me that I would know what to do as soon as I went on my planned two-week holiday to visit Dan in-situ. Arriving in the sunny, cosmopolitan city in winter, greeted by the love of my life, I was still crippled by indecision. I spent a lot of the time thinking and talking The Decision to death.
It wasn’t until the last day when I went to a mediation class that I stopped thinking and started feeling. At the end of this meditation we all picked a card from a pack of words and mine, phenomenally, was ‘Wellness (or for me, Wellbeing) : a feeling or state of mind which emanates outwards like love. In fact, Wellness is love.’
I realised I wasn’t actually faced with a dichotomous decision at all. My partner and my project are not mutually exclusive; Dan is Love and Love is (creating) Wellbeing. Personal relationships and wellbeing are pivotal to the success of any project. I have been so driven by my belief that CWB is what the UK needs to respond to the mental health of the nation that I have been ignoring my own heart, often to the detriment of my own wellbeing. If it is a dichotomous decision – then I can have both my relationship and my project!
As soon as I realised this, I acknowledged some incredible leads that had been emerging in Melbourne. From all the thinking and talking about The Decision I’d been blind to the potential venues I’d been visiting, the similar projects I’d come across, all the people offering to help set CWB up if I do decide to go there.
Photos: A meditation room off the busiest street in Melbourne and a craft class I stumbled across.
And as for the irresistible India – I hope to visit before I leave for Aus’ and maintain my relationship at distance, with my heart (and the internet).
Through this experience, I’ve discovered that any decision made with love can only be met with love. Quite phenomenally, a Creating Wellbeing UK committee has naturally formed with people committed to continuing the project while I’m in Australia for a few years. I look forward to seeing how it evolves with the hearts and minds of these creative, intelligent and loving people.
I’ve also coincidentally met someone working for a large happiness organisation in the UK who is also moving to Melbourne to be with their partner who wants to set up something similar over there.
The world of wellbeing is a small place full of love, if you stop and allow yourself to feel it.
Photos: More wellbeing ‘signs’ chalked up around Melbs; my creation at the craft class.